No Attack update this week... but something altogether different after seeing the B7 story Gold and being monumentally pissed off at the ending. Basically, Avon acts completely idiotic and trusting, falling hook-line-and-sinker for an obvious shady deal of Servalan's.
So, what would the story be like if I, and not Colin Davis, had penned it? Mostly it probably would have been the same as the lead-up to this point was quite decent... but the ending would be radically different. And this is the only part I have (and probably will be bothered to) written so far. Since last night when I saw it for the first time. Bear in mind I've just whipped this up quickly, no editing or any jazzy fizzle like that.
SCENE 8 BILLION: THE INCREDIBLE QUARRY-PLANET OF BETA-15
(Dayna, Avon and Keiller are all waiting by the large casket of gold in the midst of a barren, desert landscape. A large jeep slowly approaches carrying several hooded figures. The jeep stops, and they unload a large metal box and approach. It becomes clear most of the hooded figures are carrying rifles. They approach to a few metres in front of Avon and co and the leader unceremoniously dumps the metal box. Avon and Dayna slowly draw their guns out of their holsters.)
AVON: There's no need to keep the mask on, Servalan.
(The leader removes the hood and the mask, revealing it is, of course, Servalan. The other figures follow suit, revealing themselves to be a band of mutoids. )
SERVALAN: So, you figured out that much?
KEILLER: (stunned) You didn't tell me about this!
AVON: (Ignoring him) Of course. When Orac told me that my "old friend" here was a former security officer for the President, it seemed all too inevitable.
SERVALAN: There have been plenty of presidents.
AVON: Oh, yes. But I know my own luck far too well to think for a moment it could be anyone but you.
KEILLER: Servalan, I swear I didn't tell him anything! I never-
SERVALAN (furiously) Shut up, Keiller, or I'll give my men the order to blast you away!
(Keiller shuts up. Servalan turns calm again and turns to Avon.)
SERVALAN: We do have to stop meeting like this.
AVON: After today, I rather think that we shall.
SERVALAN: There's no need to be so melodramatic, Avon, even if it is a force of habit. This is just a simple transaction, my money for your gold. Can't we both be happy?
(Dayna raises her gun)
DAYNA: You killed my father.
(The Federation mutoids tense and raise their rifles. Keiller pulls Dayna's gun hand down)
KEILLER: Please! We can get out of this alive! Isn't that what we all want?
AVON: Yes... we can get out of this alive. A very good point. Because it's not your style, is it, Servalan? If you've ever shown mercy no one has seen it. And yet... this is just a transaction.
(Avon kicks open the box. It's filled with notes)
AVON: Bank notes. Genuine. That you want us to have.
SERVALAN: And why not take them?
AVON: I've thought this whole scheme over... and discussed it with my dear friend Orac. You have only one possible motivation for letting us take this money: our humiliation. And as it just so happens Federation talks are in place right now to annex Zeroc as a new territory. Meaning Zeroc currency could be worthless in a matter of days. Gold, however, no matter what it's colour, shall always be in favour.
SERVALAN: Very impressive. But you're still here. Did you want to see me again that badly?
(Avon grins ominously)
AVON: You could say that.
DAYNA: One last time.
(The mutoids take a step forward, aiming their rifles. Avon and Dayna raise their guns.)
KEILLER: Stop, nobody needs to be killed here! Avon, let's leave.
AVON: (Coldly) Shut up. Servalan, if we holster our weapons will your drones show us the same courtesy?
AVON: I want to make a little demonstration. We are all friends now, aren't we?
(Servalan thinks for a moment and nods to her mutoids. They lower their rifles. Avon and Dayna put away their guns.)
AVON: Good. Dayna, show your latest toy to our friends.
(Dayna pulls out a tiny cylinder, and tosses it to one of the mutoids.)
(The mutoid awkwardly does so, and some of the others raise their rifles quickly. When it becomes clear that it's not a bomb they calm down.)
DAYNA (to mutoid) What do you make of it?
MUTOID: (Examining it) It's useless.
MUTOID: A simple laser ignition - one bolt. Remote control activated. Useless.
DAYNA: Then I suppose you wouldn't mind throwing it as far as you can?
(The mutoid looks to Servalan. She smiles in return)
SERVALAN: Let these two have their fun. Go on.
(Puzzled, the mutoid tosses the device as far away as she can - it travels a long way.)
AVON: Good. Dayna.
(Dayna pulls out a tiny remote and flicks the switch. There is a massive explosion from where the device landed)
KEILLER: What the-
SERVALAN (to mutoid) You said that wasn't a bomb!
MUTOID: It wasn't. I-
AVON: She's right. It wasn't. Just a single laser bolt. You see, Servalan, you made one mistake. Well, maybe two, because you clearly thought I was stupid to boot... but you let me set the terms for the meeting. Soolin told me about Beta-15... completely obscure, completely unknown and completely deserted. And with one fatal quirk: Scion particles infesting the entire atmosphere. Their molecular weight is so great that when they are subjected to laser interference the friction creates a violent explosion.
KEILLER: (near fainting) Oh my...
(Servalan starts to look panicky)
SERVALAN: Drop the guns!
(The mutoids do so, still not showing emotion. Dayna pulls out her own gun again)
DAYNA: And we have these..
(She fires six times, quickly - blasting away the tires on Servalan's jeep. Dayna then grins as she removes the cartridge fro the gun and replaces it.)
DAYNA: Percussion bullets.
(Avon draws his own gun. Servalan is near hysterical)
SERVALAN (to mutoids) Kill them! Kill them!
(The mutoids are uncertain, and try to rush Avon and Dayna, some even pulling out their syringes to attack, while Servalan tries to run away. Avon blasts one away, before diving through the scrum and tackling Servalan by the ankles. Dayna, meanwhile, expertly shoots down all of the mutoids - one of them nearly stabs her but Dayna kicks it in the face and shoots it once it has hit the ground. Unusually, she seems to be completely cold and detached. Keiller whimpers weakly in a foetal position. Avon rolls Servalan so she is face up. Her face is filled with disbelief.)
SERVALAN: It... it wasn't meant to be like this...
AVON: I guessed that.
(He shoves the gun into Servalan's face)
SERVALAN: Please Avon... Sleer has become powerful. Very powerful. Soon she could be a Councillor. Councillor Sleer and Commissioner Avon. You could make a fortune... hundreds of men at your command. Maybe even your own planet. Do you understand? I could give you anything you wanted...
AVON: Could you give me Blake?
AVON: Then join him.
(Avon shoots Servalan in the heart. She shrieks violently, but clings onto life. Her last words are very weak)
SERVALAN: Somehow... I never thought it would be you...
AVON: It nearly wasn't. Dayna and I flipped a coin. You're lucky, all said. Dayna wanted to shoot you nineteen times, once for every year of her life you destroyed. But you know me. Straight to the point, as always.
SERVALAN: This... isn't right...
AVON: Dying alone, cold in the dirt and the grime of an unloved world? I can't think of anything more natural. You can live in the stars all you want... sooner or later you'll die in the mud.
(Servalan looks weaker...but the ghost of a smile crosses her face)
SERVALAN: Avon... Blake...
AVON (tersely) What about him?
SERVALAN: He's... he's...
AVON: He's what?
(Servalan slumps and falls face-first into the mud. Avon is silent. Keiller takes his hands down from his face.)
KEILLER: Is it over?
(Avon is silent. Dayna moves over and gently grips his shoulder)
DAYNA: It was just another one of her games, Avon.
AVON: Yes. (beat) Almost certainly...
DAYNA: She's dead.
AVON: All good things must come to an end.
KEILLER: And you called me ruthless!
(Avon rounds on Keiller angrily)
AVON: No, I called you idiotic. Something I stand by right now. You dragged us into this mess!
KEILLER: Mess? It's worked out, hasn't it?
AVON: If it has I didn't notice. We have a crate of gold that's worthless, and a crate of money that's going to be any day soon. All we've managed is to kill an old enemy, and I can't say you were much help there.
KEILLER: I didn't know-
AVON: Exactly. You're ignorant, untrustworthy and a liability. And you were never my friend. This is where our paths split.
(Avon and Dayna both put on teleport bracelets)
DAYNA: Unless you can eat gold, I suggest you try and find Servalan's ship. It can't be too far away.
AVON (Into bracelet) Vila, it's over. Bring us up.
(Avon and Dayna teleport away)
(Keiller falls to his knees, crying pathetically)
SCENE 8 BILLION AND ONE: SCORPIO
(Dayna and Avon both shimmer into view on the teleport pad. They are deathly silent as they step down into the bridge proper. The rest of the crew look awkward)
TARRANT: So... she's dead.
SOOLIN: I thought you'd look happier.
AVON: She's just one. One Federation officer out of thousands. An annoying one, but there'll be another to replace her just standing in line.
(The crew exchange looks.)
TARRANT: You don't sound yourself, Avon.
DAYNA: Well, before she died Servalan-
AVON: Dayna, no.
AVON: (angrily) NO!
VILA: She what?
DANYA: She said -
(Everyone's giving Avon odd looks now.)
AVON: Absolutely nothing. No last words, nothing. Just a limp, pale rag doll slowly rotting into the sand.
SLAVE: Yes, master?
AVON: Set course for base.
SLAVE: At once, master! I hope that you all can recover from this terrible ordeal, masters.
AVON (dryly) Thank you.
(Avon walks towards the corridor)
AVON: I don't know about the rest of you, but I need some rest. And some time to think.
(Before leaving he turns to face the rest of the crew)
AVON: And if ANYONE ever says anything to me about gold again, they'll regret it.
Yeah, I killed off Servalan. Big whoop, wanna fight about it? Honestly, I think the character is over-used to buggery and her behaviour in that story just screams out for her to be killed due to her incredible smugness.
I do feel a little bit dirty now, having written a fic that Marian de Haan would probably enjoy...